What if... continued

 
What if there was no technology? Well I sure as hell wouldn't be listening to my iPod right now, or even typing this blog. Id be writing on a piece of paper with a quill. I do actually remember the time before cell phones existed. If I wanted to talk to a friend, id walk a mile or so to her house or use the land line. That was a better time honestly. People weren't so lazy then. I remember the nerves I get right before calling a crush and hearing the phone ring on the other line, almost hoping they wouldn't answer. Now we have texting, a very impersonal way of communication. I like it but at the same time I don't. At least now I can talk to my crush without feeling like my heart is going to fall out of my butt.

What if...

 What if the sky fell or the moon exploded.
 What if Batman was real!
 What if one day ill meet Joe Jonas
 What if one day im famous
 What if me and my ex got back together
 What if people could breath under water
 What if the sun wasn't really that hot
 What if the earths core wasn't lava but chocolate.
 What if superheros were real
 What if my date doesn't go very well
 What if I trip over something today
 What if I never get married
 What if rain was actually angel tears.
 What if we had no light
 What if we could erase certain memories
 What if we could control time
 What if we really could be anything
 What if life was like a disney movie
 What if animals could talk
 What if we had rewind button
 What if we could take back what we say
 What if life was really like a box of chocolates
 What if we could paint with all the colors of the wind.

What if superheros existed? What if every time you were in danger, this man or woman just appeared out of no where and rescued you. Its a fun thought. I use to always believe Batman and Gotham City were real. Of course I was only ten. When I got older and discovered that the world isn't filled with superheros, I was sad. We have plenty of villains so why not superheros? I know in terms of speaking there are fire fighters and police officers and they in their own right are heroes, but im talking about Superman, Batman, Flash, Hulk, Thor, Spiderman, etc.. Wouldn't it be nice if every time our car broke down, or any time we got lost, a superhero would come to save our day? Imagine what the world would be like! I'm not saying that some criminal mastermind would try to take over the world all the time, but if for one day our city had a true hero...It would be amazing and exciting. Unfortunately our life is not a comic book series. The only thing real life has that a comic book has, are villains. People who do bad things for no reason other than their personal gain or to create chaos and destruction. If regular people attempt to be vigilantes then they are the ones who go to prison as well as the criminals they are trying to stop.  Its fair but at the same time its not. If every regular person took the law into  their own hands, imagine that chaos. Wouldn't be good, but its nice to pretend that superheros exist, or that their are extraordinaire people like Buffy Summers walking around, even mutants. I think it gives us hope to think that something amazing and wonderful is out there hiding somewhere.
 


What if we could erase personal memories? It could be any memory. Maybe a bad experience, or maybe memories from a previous relationship. If you had the power to erase personal memories, would you ever do it? I think even the bad memories are something most people want to keep, granted we push them away into corners of the mind, but they were a learning experience. Its good to remember the good and the bad parts of life. If we only wanted the good then what happens if we were to just keep repeating those bad mistakes or even just mistakes that made us feel bad. We need memories that we would rather not have. I'm sure I have plenty that I would like to get rid of, but at the same time, if I had the option im not sure id do it.. I want to remember my experiences, the good and the bad. Those memories make me who I am today. Id hate to repeat the same mistakes just because I chose to forget them. Repeating history usually always ends badly. If you don't know your past, you wont have a future.

Inspiration

 
This world is so big and beautiful that its no wonder it causes so much inspiration. So many colors and sights to see that just open a whole new world (No Disney pun intended) Music can also be a huge inspiration. Its so powerful that it can change your mood on a moments notice depending on the song. If you're sad, your most likely to listen to something up beat to put you in a better mood. Unlike me who listens to sad music when I'm sad. Stupid, I know. Its amazing what a little inspiration can do. Maybe cause you to take a random road trip, or dance to your next class, or maybe even paint a picture when you didn't even think you knew how to paint! Its all about what you're capable of and pushing those limits. When I am inspired I usually sing. Sometimes I write or draw, though I haven't picked up oil pastels in quite some time, and you know what they say. A talent left unpracticed is a waste. Well actually I am not sure who said that, or if anyone said that. Maybe I can coin it and make it my phrase, who knows. The point is, find what inspires you and channel that into something even more incredible and inspiring.

Mufasa

In my previous post I had mentioned how I felt there was still so much I had yet to learn from my grandfather. The best way for me to describe him would be to compare him to Mufasa from the lion king. Just without as much emotion. I have an enormous amount of respect for this man. I'm not sure how ill react when I hear the news eventually. I know my mother will be distraught for a while and ill have to be strong for her. Which is fine, I can handle that. His lectures usually aren't planned. If the man feels like he needs you to hear something, you're going to hear it whether you want to or not. When I was younger I didn't want to, but now that i'm older I yurn for it. To hear all the wise words that he has for me. Its inspiring and saddening. Although I feel like even after hes gone he will still have some kind of lesson for me to learn. Kind of like the scene in the lion king where simba is all grown up and his fathers appearance is shaped through the clouds, and simba is told to remember who he is and where he came from. I tend to picture it like that once he goes. Maybe it makes it easier to cope with the thought of losing him. Either way, I still have him for the time being, and I need to make the best of it. Its stupid to prepare the loss of someone whose still here. He wouldn't want me to do this. I will celebrate his life and his teachings before and after the loss.

Fear

Fear. A simple four letter word that opens a door into the darkest corners of your mind. Fear doesnt always have to involve the monsters under your bed or even the demons in your head. There are different types of fears. Fear of clowns, fear of losing somebody you love, fear of losing a job or failing a class. What do I fear? Well as of late my grandfather has been sick, and has been making arrangements. He even had a heart to heart with me about how much time he didn't have left on earth. My grandfather is not an emotional kind of man. So for him to tell me that he feels he is dying was really hard to hear. The thought of not having him around for much longer scares me. I feel I still have so much more to learn from him. I don't have a lot of time to see him these days. Between work and school its hard for me to make it out there to see them. I'm trying to make plans to go during spring break, so hopefully that will work out. Fear is a powerful emotion. It has a connection to almost every other emotion that we as humans feel. Fear can lead to anger, which can lead to sadness. Sometimes I actually laugh when im scared or nervous. Its a defense mechanism that allows me to understand that ok this is happening. Fear can also give us the push we need to do something or try something that we weren't sure we could do. I remember one time I went with a group of people to whats called The Barn Swings. I cant remember where it was, all I know is that it burned down a while ago. When we went there was this big noose looking swing that was hanging there, but the climb up was really high. We had to get on this really sketchy platform, and they would harness us into the noose. I was so terrified that I was sure I could make the jump. My knees were trembling, when suddenly they pushed us, and we were free falling! Its absolutely the most adrenaline pumping, terrifying thing ive done, but in the end it was so much fun! Fear can do some crazy things

Discovery

I enjoy hiking A LOT. Its full of adventure and new experiences, not to mention the amazing sites you will see every time you go out. My grandparents live on a farm, and they have plenty of land to explore. That is generally how I spend my time there. I remember one time, a long time ago my aunt had gone walking with me, and we came across this beautiful waterfall. Its was an incredible discovery. Ever since then I kept trying to refind what I had found before and never could...until one day I did. To describe this place in words is almost impossible. The peak of the waterfall is high enough to see out for quite a distance. Lord knows that if I ever fall id be screwed. I would meet a rocky ravine with my face, or broken bones, or both.  In the base of the fall, there are a few pools of water that collect over time. Its not completly filled with water, so I can climb down and walk underneath the fall. Its not easy getting down. There are three ways in my opinion; climb down a very steep wall, walk around the falls sides, or jump/fall. Usually I challenge myself and try to climb down the wall. It doesnt always end well, but thats what adventure and discovery is all about! It wouldnt be as exciting if you werent risking your life now and then. Now im not saying do anything dangerous or drastic, just go out and discover something new for you, or rediscover what you once thought was lost. Its amazing what you will find 

Let It Go

 Letting go. Its one of the hardest things to do in life, but once we allow ourselves to move on from whatever it is that is holding us back, we are free. Something I have been trying to let go of is my ex. Well call him...Scott. Scott and I had been together for almost two years before we broke up. We broke up in 2012...its two years later and I still find it difficult to let go of the memories and move on with myself. Some days I think I have...then occasionally I will see him and it all floods back like new. For some reason guys make it look so easy to move on after a bad break up. How do they do that?? To me its almost an insult to everything we had. Dont get me wrong, I want nothing more than for him to find happiness and peace, and if its not with me then thats ok too. Now the challenge of letting go and moving on from him. Two years later and I feel like ive made no progress. So what do I do to create progress? As Iyanla Vanzant says, "You gotta Feel, Deal, then Heal and thats exactly what I am going to do. I felt the loss and pain of losing someone I loved, now I have to face the fact that hes gone and we wont be together in the future and deal with it. Once you deal with what is holding you back and you face it, the healing begins. I am ready for my healing to begin.

The Lincoln Log

 Remember the tub of Lincoln Logs that we had as a kid? And remember how you all it took was one block to start a foundation for whatever it was that you were building? Well think about this for a moment, in everything that we do no matter what aspect of our life it involves, we still need that first Lincoln log to start our foundation. When your looking for a new job, the first block you need is a place in which you would like to work. The second block is the application form, and the third is simply obtaining that first interview. You have just created the foundation to getting that new job. So now what? Keep in mind this is just an example. Once you have the foundation, its easier to build the rest of your tower, or castle, or whatever it is that you use to build with your Lincoln Logs. Now, instead of building a castle, you are building the rest of your life. So where does your foundation start? What is the first block that you need to start that foundation?

First Post! Welcome!

Welcome to my blog called, Undecided! A bit of irony in that. For this being my first post I am going to keep it simple. Im Nemo. My interests are many things, which is why I named this blog Undecided. I couldnt pick just once topic, so why not have them all? One day I feel inspirational and the next I want to go all fan girl and talk about Buffy and Angel (Buffy the Vampires slayer) So lets take this adventure and welcome to my world of... Undecided

Enjoy.